limbo.

a girlfriend of mine was sharing her season of anxiousness with me yesterday. she is a dear friend to me & i strongly desire to bear her burdens with her. i wish i could just lift this off her shoulders and carry it for her. i wish i could bless her in such a way that her season of life would seem smaller and more insignificant. i just wish we could pray her out of it.

all these things are deep & good desires of my heart. all true & pure.

but as much as they are desires of mine - it's not reality. as a friend, it's hard for me to realize that sometimes. it's not my job to make sense of it all and to explain it away. as much as i want to fix it, i can't.

so i listen.

i listen to her thoughts & her precious heart as she pours out to me all that it is going on. i listen as she goes through all of the possible scenarios - all of which are less than ideal in our eyes. i listen as she tells of her heartache & her desires for her children, her family and her marriage. she is dear to me. and this season in her life makes her all that more dear.

and as she shared and asked for advice i was quick to tell her to - for lack of a better term - chill out.   how dare i say that to her, even if the thoughts i shared with her came from the heart and she took them as such. there were no hard feelings on her part, we both just feel free to tell it like it is.

but i realized, after telling her "He'll work it all out" and hung up the phone that i'm coming from a different place than she is. there is no doubt that she has witnessed the favor of God in her life. no doubt that she's experienced His goodness & love & peace & blessings. but she's in a season of hardship & it is so hard to hear "it'll all work out" when everything is beyond your control.

i texted her late last night with a thought that the Lord had placed on my heart.

i have recently come out of a season of doubt - a season of limbo & uncertainty. i am currently in a peaceful season - one in which contentedness comes easy &  joy is always within my grasp. but i've been where she is, and being fresh out of that season it is easy to remember His faithfulness.

i'm fresh out of a season of limbo. in the past three years we've moved two times. when we were looking for a house to rent two years ago & were in a time crunch, we were ready & willing to rent this awful house that probably should have been condemned. we prayed & cried about it - but we wanted to be willing if that's what the Lord had for us. and at the time - in a time crunch - it was honestly our best option. we applied for the house and got denied, for no good reason. we were dumbfounded & heartbroken. was the Lord telling us we were going the wrong way?

but the VERY next day, a perfect house in the PERFECT area came along & was the perfect price.

it all worked out.

if you find yourself in a broken season today.... weary & tired & alone... i want you to do something. i want you to grab a piece of paper & a  pen and sit in the stillness. think back on ugly seasons in your life. i challenge you to think of ONE instance where the Lord came through faithful. where you so clearly saw His hand move in your life that there was no other explanation than to accept that the Lord was present - and He had gone before you on that journey. i bet if you think of one you can think of ten. go ahead, write them down and keep them close to your heart.

let that reminder of His faithfulness lighten your dark journey today. let His love pour over you today as you recall His goodness & His grace in your life. 

let your blessings color your day today - not your circumstances.