Thursday, February 27, 2014


tuesday, the hubbs and i had the awesome privilege of meeting with the founder of an organization called bravelove. i HIGHLY encourage all of you to check it out. 

their mission is to help pair moms who can't be mothers to those who find themselves mothers who don't want to be moms.

what an awesome goal? i tear up just writing it down. 

as many of you know, this is our heartsong. i don't know why the Lord has so strongly pressed this on our hearts for over ten years now, we have not had a personal experience with adoption, abortion or unplanned pregnancy. i cannot begin to imagine the heartache and the hoplessness that may come with one of those situations. but nevertheless this is something that we want to fight for - personally & politically.

but our goal is NOT to be ANTI-abortion; our goal, from the very bottom of our hearts, is to be PRO-life. 

please hear me on this. we are NOT just PRO-life in the sense of the baby. we want to be PRO mother. we desperately want to advocate on behalf of the mothers that find themselves in desperate situations. abortion in and of itself is heart wrenching of course, but the women who wake up in a situation that feels beyond their control and impossible is something that breaks us.

i understand that this may be a whole 'sex before marriage' debate for you. i get that, and i'm not advocating that we should just accept & tolerate it. however, the fact of the matter is that the majority of teenagers {and pre-teens and singles} ARE having sex outside of the confines of marriage. we can preach and teach abstinence all we want in our schools and in our churches, but it's still happening. i think the MOST important place to teach abstinence is in our HOMES, as parents with our children. 

the problem is finding the balance of teaching abstinence and being open to hear what is actually going on from our children & the people around us. i think this is an essential ingredient in ending abortion.

here's the truth of the matter: the Bible says that sex is designed to be between a man & woman within the sacred bond of marriage. in my opinion, it is simply not a gray area. 


we live in the world, and it is completely saturated with sex and love and fairy tales. sexting is a reality among teens {and pre-teens}, and we cannot keep shielding our eyes as a body of believers and act like it's not happening. our whole culture is desensitized to sexuality and it has become the norm. i believe there are so many ways that we, as parents, can help de-saturate our children's minds, but the minute they walk out the door it'll be on the next billboard they see or in the news stands at the grocery stores. simply not watching tv & listening to only christian music isn't going to completely solve the problem. our kids are going to see our sex-driven culture no matter what we do.

so here's my point: if the church continues to bring shame and guilt to the young women who find themselves in an unplanned pregnancy, i truly believe that the abortion rates are NOT going to go down. yes, we don't agree with their choice, and yes, we aren't supposed to "tolerate" sin, but the reality is that the preganancy is not the sin; having sex outside of marriage is the sin. 

so why are we singling out the ones who have a visible consequence and exiling them from the church, whether intentional or not?

the church needs to be a safe haven for these women to come and be loved, not to be shamed and guilt-ridden. we might do a good job of accepting those who are outside of the church without judgement, but what about the girl sitting in the pew next to you? what if she told you she was pregnant after she & her boyfriend made a 'mistake'? would you be less loving toward her because she "knew better"? 

i feel so much love for the women who find that it seems easier to get an abortion than it does to face the shame & guilt of the church body... it's just flat wrong for the body of christ to be found that judgmental and unforgiving. Jesus was an amazing & awesome blend of Truth & grace. we need to be that blend too or i fear that as a result of not being a safe haven for unplanned pregnancy, we are inadvertently becoming an advocate for abortion. as Christians, we need to be able to hear what is going on in the world without going into shock so that we can better show Jesus to others.  

these women, despite their choices & their circumstances, are brave to choose life. whether they choose to parent themselves or place for adoption, the women need to be recognized as having courage.  and i, for one, want to make it easier for them to be brave. don't you? 

if you have any thoughts on this, please feel free to email me & i'd love to have a conversation with you about it. please remember that these are simply my opinions & thoughts on the subject, i am not making any accusations or pointing the finger at any specific church or organization. the church that i speak of is the body that we ALL belong to as believers. .  i know this is a tough subject for many of you, AND i know there might be one of you who finds yourself in a desperate situation this morning and i'd love to encourage you if you'd allow me to. 

blessings today. 

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